She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
