Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
