Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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