I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
