I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize