You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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