dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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