i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
