i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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