cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Never underestimate the power of titties
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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