There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
