Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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