Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize