You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize