Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
