one two three fourrrrnication!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
