Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
