dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Randomize
