Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
