So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
