we're blogging at a bar
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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