Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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