i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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