At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
