it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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