I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
