Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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