just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
