She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
