We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I want to make a zoo with you.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize