There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
handjob tips. give me some.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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