i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize