no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize