just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize