can u get pink eye on your cock?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize