just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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