i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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