Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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