remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
