he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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