lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
you would pick up someone in the library
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
