Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
What a dumb baby whore.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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