Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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