Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
