girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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