North Korea, Best Korea!
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
