He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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