i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
