Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
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