so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
